Experimental Marais

Unfortunately, after staying there this weekend, the main takeaway has been “all style, no substance”. Good: Decor is 10/10. Think of a moody soho house. Bad: It’s too dark during the day. They should up the lighting a little during the day in the rooms. I didn’t know bulbs came in such a low wattage. I needed a torch to get dressed as couldn’t see my clothes in the wardrobe. It’s great at night but the lighting is bizarrely dark when it’s daytime and you are just trying to go about your day. It was impossible to turn on the bathroom light without turning on every light in the room. Annoying if you need to use the toilet at night. We used torch on phones… Check your bill. There were charges for items that were not ours at the end of the stay. It was €9 for ONE cup of English breakfast tea… At night when their restaurant is busy, the FOH don’t seem to care about hotel guests. We ask if we could have a drink at the bar and it seemed to be a massive inconvenience for the host who then pointed to a table that was (and I’m not exaggerating) about 8 inches wide). We didn’t stay for more than one… I understand if they’re busy but in other hotels I’ve stayed at, guests are given a little bit more love as we are paying 5 star prices… We called down for stuff a few times and it simply didn’t arrive to the room… a hairdryer and shower cap for example as there were none in the room. They never came until I asked twice again hours later. I can’t understand how there’s a whip in the room but no show cap!? The spa… 🤦‍♀️ don’t know where to start. The steam room has no steam and the jacuzzi is cold… the only two offerings… all looks beautiful but pointless if they’re not operating properly. Massage technique was great but my legs were covered in bio freeze!!! It was so horrible and painful for the entire day after… the bio freeze amount was just so much and you end up in pain for 80% of the massage and freezing cold. £150 for the pleasure… The bed… it’s October. No duvet. A sheet and a thin blanket and then a giant pillow. Giant!! For no reason, just ends up on the floor, has no function…. Running theme of the hotel it seems. In summary: if you are just going to get some pictures for your Instagram and that’s your vibe: Go for it. If you need a functioning hotel, there is way better for the same price.

While the food was satisfactory, the standout elements were undoubtedly the captivating decor and the fantastic vibes, creating a memorable and enjoyable atmosphere.